


One Of Life's Little Tortures

by Scourgefan12



Category: Hellsing
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:53:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26806900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scourgefan12/pseuds/Scourgefan12
Summary: Doc finally has some time off work. Against his wishes, he ends up spending it with Jan.
Relationships: The Doctor/Jan Valentine
Kudos: 2





	One Of Life's Little Tortures

Doc had once thought that Jan was someone you were only supposed to handle in small doses. Very small doses, he didn't like having to be around Jan for more than even an hour. And really, could you blame him? He was sure everyone else in Millennium shared this sentiment, Jan was just a handful that most people didn't want to have to deal with.

Over time however, Doc learned that this view wasn't quite accurate. Spending a lot of time around Jan wasn't nearly as bad a thing as most people made it out to be.

Well okay, yes it was. But only sometimes. 

You just needed to develop a tolerance for him. Once you got used to Jan, he would start seeming a lot less bad. You would even find yourself enjoying his presence, maybe even wishing he'd be around more. You might even find yourself seeking him out, both consciously and unconsciously.

That was Doc's experience, at least. Jan insisted on bothering him all hours of the day. Whether he actually thought they were friends or just liked being a nuisance, it was impossible to tell, and it didn't really matter. As this went on, Doc found himself minding it less and less, to the point where Jan didn't even register as a disturbance anymore. That wasn't to say he stopped being annoying, Doc just got used to it. He also found ways to deal with it, as he got to know Jan better.

Jan was actually a very simple creature. Give him attention, and he was bound to stick around you. That was likely what drew him to Doc in the first place, Doc had been one of the only people who bothered giving him the time of day. Most others would try to either avoid or ignore him, while Doc had actually given him a response, been easy to provoke.

Another thing with Jan though, he would get a good deal less annoying if you gave him positive attention. Let him know you actually like having him around, and he'd suddenly start being a lot less obnoxious and inflammatory. That aspect of him wouldn't go away completely, since it was just a part of him, but he wouldn't be like that on purpose. Rather than intentionally provoking whoever he was with, he'd be annoying by accidentally going too far with his jokes or not recognizing when it was time to stop talking and let whoever he was with get a few words in.

It wasn't that bad, really. Doc actually thought it was kind of nice, having someone who liked being around him so much.

One downside to this was the fact that Jan didn't seem to have anyone else to spend time with. Because of this, he was rather clingy. He would spend hours of each day around Doc, never even considering that the other might like some time to himself. Whenever he got remotely bored or lonely, he'd inevitably show up wherever Doc was. 

This, too, was something Doc had learned to deal with. He knew how to keep Jan occupied and stop the other from getting in the way or causing too much trouble. This didn't completely solve the problem, but it did make it easier to handle.

Jan's clinginess was something Doc was currently occupied with, actually.

You see, Doc didn't get much time off. Admittedly, this was mostly his own fault. It wasn't like he was required to work as much as he did, Major mostly trusted him to regulate his own schedule, as long as there was nothing urgent that he was needed for. He just usually used this to give himself more work. That was how he preferred it, there was a lot that needed to be done and he liked being productive. 

That being said, he recognized the importance of free time. He tried to make time for himself at least once a month, give himself some sort of leisure so that he wouldn't go insane from the stress. Not that he found his job particularly stressful a lot of the time, but still.

He was nestled in his bed reading over some notes he'd written about a few of his more recent experiments. Which, sure, wasn't really the most relaxing way to spend his time and didn't even really count as taking a break from his work, but whatever. It was _his_ time off, he got to choose how he spent it. 

This had been going pretty well, he'd picked out a few flaws in how he'd been handling his recent projects and had been forming some ideas for what to do next, ways to improve.

Before he could make too much progress though, Jan barged in. 

One thing to know about Jan, he rarely bothered knocking, pretty much only doing so when the room he was trying to enter was locked. Many people tried to dissuade this behavior, but to no avail. This was another aspect of Jan that you just had to get used to.

If Jan interrupting him wasn't enough to break Doc's concentration, then him demanding Doc's attention did the trick.

He wouldn't shut up, expecting Doc to drop everything to listen to him. He prattled on mostly about what he'd done earlier that night. Apparently he'd gone out and got some hunting done, he made sure to give a very detailed report of what he'd done to his victims. Likely not because he thought Doc actually cared, but because he thought it was amusing. He told tales of panicked civilians spilling their guts and people getting decapitated before even knowing what hit them in between fits of giggles. 

Doc hardly spared him a glance, taking in the words with less concern than he probably should've. "Don't stir up too much trouble."

Jan rolled his eyes at the reminder. "Yeah I know, I'm not a fuckin' idiot." Very debatable. "I didn't leave no witnesses and I killed all the ghouls I made before they could go anywhere."

That eased Doc's mind. Jan may have been irresponsible, and reckless, and countless other things, but he was good at following orders when he needed to. He knew not to endanger Millennium by drawing unwanted attention, despite the fact that he'd definitely have lots of fun by doing so. 

Jan crawled into bed next to Doc, peeking over his shoulder. "So, what're you up to?"

Doc noted that Jan didn't have nearly as much blood on him as one would expect, given his earlier activities. He didn't have any at all actually, he must have showered or something before deciding to show up. That was much appreciated, getting bloodstains all over his bedsheets wasn't really on Doc's list of things to do. "Nothing much, just looking over some notes from my more recent-"

"Damn, that's boring." Jan didn't even let Doc finish, which was another thing that happened fairly often. "Aren't you supposed to like... not be working today?"

"Yes, and I'm not. This technically isn't work."

Jan gave Doc a look of 'are you fucking kidding me' but chose not to badmouth Doc's decision more than he already had. Instead, he just decided to be generally disruptive.

He wormed his way into Doc's lap, effectively blocking Doc's view of his not-work, wrapping his arms around Doc's shoulders. "Come on, you're supposed to be relaxing, right? Why don't we do something a little more fun?" 

Doc got the sudden urge to shove Jan to the floor. He resisted it, barely. "What part of 'i'm busy' don't you understand?"

Jan looked a little lost for a moment. "Uh... you never said you were busy?"

He'd _implied_ it, hadn't he? Apparently he hadn't been clear enough though, seeing as Jan couldn't take a hint.

Jan did seem to pick up on how Doc was feeling then, at least. To be fair, it was hard to miss someone glaring right in front of your face. He actually looked a little guilty, hesitating for a few seconds before moving to get up. "Man, if it's that important I guess I can leave you alone."

Doc sighed, putting his notes to the side so he could hold Jan in place. "No, it's fine. I suppose I could make a little time for you." Really, if there was any day to spend time with Jan, it was today. He could always finish what he'd been doing later.

Jan's sulking was immediately replaced with an excited grin. He angled his face so that he and Doc's noses were practically touching.

"Only if you behave yourself, though. No funny business." Doc pushed him away, just enough so that there was room to breathe.

Jan had the decency to not look too disappointed at that, just glad that he was allowed to stay. "I always behave myself, I don't know what you're talkin' about." He chose to rest his head on Doc's shoulder, adjusting his position so it was a bit more comfortable for the two of them.

They stayed like that for a little while. Doc was kind of tempted to say something to break the silence, but decided against it. There was rarely a quiet moment with Jan around, he figured he should enjoy it while it lasts. Plus, he didn't really have anything to say.

Jan, of course, ended up choosing to speak after not too long. "Hey, Doc?"

"Hm?"

"How's the whole turning people into vampires thing work?"

"Why the sudden interest?" Doc had a hard time believing that Jan actually cared about that sort of information, especially when not even a few minutes ago he'd trashed Doc's work for being boring. Maybe he was trying to make up for doing that, fearing Doc might still be upset with him.

"Just curious, I guess." Jan gave a little shrug. "Like, is it the chip that turns 'em, or what?"

Doc almost laughed at the question, but held himself back. He didn't want to make Jan change his mind. "Of course not, the chip is for tracking purposes only. It wouldn't make sense for that to be what makes someone turn into a vampire."

"Okay, then what _does_ turn 'em into vampires?"

"It's a bit complicated." Doc warned. "You might not fully understand it."

Jan didn't take offense to the blatant insult against his intelligence, in fact it got a small laugh out of him. "Yeah well, I could try. Just lay it on me."

Well, if Jan was really asking, how could Doc say no? He did exactly what was requested, explaining the ins and outs of how the surgery worked, how the DNA of Mina Harker was the key ingredient to the whole process. He then proceeded to explain who Mina was, why her DNA was so important. He was probably going into more detail than Jan cared for, but that wasn't something he was particularly concerned about. It wasn't often he had the chance to talk about these sorts of things, he was going to take full advantage of it.

He did finish eventually, genuinely kind of impressed with himself for being able to just recite all of that. "And that is how the process works. Now, if you have any questions, I'd be happy to answer them."

He was greeted by complete silence. That was a bit odd, Jan always had something to say. It wasn't like he'd actually been expecting any questions, but a comment about how dumb or boring the explanation was would have been appreciated. They would signal that Jan had actually been listening.

The reason for Jan's silence was made clear after a small bit of inspection.

The son of a bitch had fallen asleep, when Doc was in the middle of talking to him no less. Doc had a suspicion that Jan had never been interested in what he had to say at all, just using his words as background noise.

Doc found that he wasn't actually upset about this in the slightest. Sure, he felt like a bit of a fool for having talked to himself for several minutes, but it wasn't anything to seriously get mad over.

Even if he _were_ mad, it would be hard to stay that way. The vampire snoozing in his lap was too cute for his mood to stay overly foul.

It occurred to him that he would be unable to move for a while, that is if he didn't want to risk waking Jan. Not that he was in a hurry to get up or anything, but still. 

He sighed, wrapping his arms more securely around Jan and carefully laying the two of them down. If he was going to be stuck here, he may as well get comfortable.

**Author's Note:**

> doc: physically i could move jan, but emotionally? imagine the toll
> 
> I have brain problems, I can't stop thinking abt these 2 <3


End file.
